I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth.
(I Corinthians 3:6)
Indie, horrified that she gave birth to a Down Syndrome baby girl, now carried the burden of what people might say about her. On our island, generally the Filipino’s believe if a baby is different in any way it is because the sins of the parents have been passed down to the child. Many parts of the world believe this too.
So when their little girl was born with Down Syndrome, people seemed to talk in the community. They said it was because of Indie’s sins, that God was angry and was passing judgment on her and her family. She was now being ostracized by her own culture.
How would one move in, team up with God and share Christ and His love in this context?
1. Building Friendships through Common Interest: Indie, a Filipina, whose husband Tom, owned a local business near our home in the Philippines, had now become one of our friends. We had gotten to know Indie and Tom through playing tennis. After we would play tennis, Indie occasionally would ask me. “Why do you do what you do?” or “Why are you here?” Her questions seemed to put my religion against hers. I kept referring her back to the Bible as my answers for the hope that was within me.
2. Building Friendships through Using their Services: When we found out about Tom’s business, we started availing of his services, giving us another opportunity to get in front of this family.
Indie grew up in a small nearby town from where we lived. This town was very religious, and steeped in superstition. The main religion was Catholicism, mixed with animism (the worship of spirits). Consequently, Indie lived in a place that feared the spirit world and what they could do to her. We would often find her children wearing bracelets that were supposed to ward off the spirits from harming them.
3. Building Friendships through Moving in During the Important Times in their Lives: When we found out that Indie was again pregnant we wanted to have a surprise baby shower for her as another way to show her God’s love. When we approached this idea to her husband, he couldn’t understand how and why we were going to have a party where people would take a shower. This idea of a ‘baby shower’ was a new cultural concept for him.
After we explained it, we both decided he would gather the friends for the party since he knew them and we didn’t. Because of the cultural differences, I followed-up with Tom several times leading up to the party to make sure we were on the same page. He had reassured me all was okay, no problem, he had it under control.
The day of the shower came, I fixed all the food, moved furniture, decorated, and put together games to play. I also invited one of the other missionaries to share a devotional, one that wouldn’t be offensive but would turn their hearts toward God in some way, and open up the doors for follow-up.
All was set up and ready to go just in time for everyone to show up. We waited and waited! About forty-five minutes went by and no one showed up, except our American team.
I left and went to Tom’s work place and said, “Hi, Tom! How are you?” “Fine”, he said.
Realizing he seemed oblivious to missing the shower. I said sheepishly, “Uh… Tom, what happened”? Tom said “What happened with what?” Slowly I said,“Did you forget the baby shower?” He said, “Ohhhh! Was that today?” “Yes, I fixed food, decorated and waited about forty five minutes and no one you invited came.” 
He said “The shower was for today!?” “Yessss!” I said “He said “Ohhhh” again , “You fixed food?” Yessss!” I said,” Lots of food”. “Is it still there.” “OHhhh, Yessss! But I put it up already thinking no one was coming. But it is okay though, I understand if you forgot? We can plan it again another time if you want?”
He said “Ohhhh!” I could tell he felt really bad! I reassured him again it was okay, (you usually have to tell Filipinos three times before they know you are serious), “Tom it is okay! Really! I just didn’t know what happened. Wasn’t sure if we got the time wrong or the day or what?”
But He said “Don’t worry I will have people there in 1 hour if that is okay? Don’t worry” “No that is okay” I said. He kept insisting. I said, “UH….. Okay! Are you sure?” “Yes!” He said and reassured me 3 times back. Off he went.
Awkward moment indeed! But it was settled. I left and went home to get the food back out.
Sure enough, about 10 ladies showed up and Indie followed. She was really surprised. They loved the games and much laughing took place. When it came time for the devotions we all sat around and Psalm 127 then 139 were presented, showing them that God knows about us, and our children even before we are born. Our children are a gift from God.
PSALM 127:3 “CHILDREN ARE A HERITAGE FROM THE LORD, OFFSPRING A REWARD FROM HIM”
PSALM 139:14 …WE ARE “FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY MADE”…
We gave her a photo album of pictures from the shower and words of the devotions with verses included. We were praying that God would use His words and our love in her life to draw her to Him in the days to come. We were being very intentional.
About two months later Indie birthed her sweet Down Syndrome baby. When we visited them in the hospital right after Indie gave birth, they were looking at the album we gave her. They were being encouraged by the verses and the words of the devotions from the shower.
At that point our conversation became a point of discussion about spiritual things. Soon after this Indie and Tom joined our Bible Study and started studying the Bible with us.
Was it easy planning this baby shower? No! Was it easy being intentional and getting in front of Tom and Indie. No!
What ways did God use us to get in front of this couple? Through the husband’s business, tennis, baby shower, then hospital. A nice friendship was being formed. We were blessed by it too.
Did God use these opportunities to share His word with them? Yes!
When they encountered problems with their baby and the culture ostracized them (they felt it anyway), were we there to minister to them? Yes!
Why? Because we had a relationship with them and they knew we cared. We were there to point them to Jesus. Teaming up with God is a process which He allows us to enter into.
Who opens the heart’s of people to the Words of God? God does! We are just instruments, tools for teaming up with God to where He is working, drawing other’s to himself.
Personal Reflections: When you read Indie and Tom’s story, how does this make you think of ways you have gotten in front of people to love them and open up spiritual conversations for the Gospel? Read Mark’s Gospel on sowing the seed (Mark 4). What can you do in sharing the Gospel where you are? What part does the Holy Spirit play when working with people? How can you trust the Holy Spirit more in the process? Please share below any thoughts in the comment section of “Teaming up with God”.
Note: Refer to “Teaming Up With God” by Dr. Jim O’Neill to read about our work in the Philippines. Names are changed and no pictures of actual baby shower was used to protect the privacy of others. We love and miss our Filipino friends who are dear to us!
From One Pilgrim to another together on the journey,
“Consider how you may spur one another on towards love and good deeds….. encouraging one another–and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” Hebrews 10:24-25 (NIV)
Please Reply in a gracious manner